That one extremely neutered “Kinktober” event including a rule that any CNC-related works have to have a mandatory aftercare scene for the submissive party but not for the dominant… it really just spells it all out, doesn’t it?
The vast majority of people, most “kinky” gays included, understand kink as nothing more than a one-way affair where a dominant gets permission to “consensually abuse” a submissive so they can carry out their dark fantasies without getting in trouble.
Everything about how kink dynamics are discussed in the popular eye makes this clear – the endless jokes about “sub behavior” and “heehee i’m such a sub i don’t care what happens to me ❤️”, the mandatory “as long as it’s consensual!” disclaimers tacked on whenever someone expresses their approval for kink, the way actual criminal law around kink largely treats it as a crime carried out by dominants against submissives. “Submissive” isn’t a role in a mutually pleasurable act, it’s just a personality trait you have that means you enjoy being mistreated. The average person is seemingly incapable of envisioning kink as anything other than an extreme extension of vanilla, cis/hetero sex, where a masculine dominant acts upon a feminine submissive who maybe gets to enjoy it too if she’s lucky.
Then everyone has the nerve to talk about “top/dom shortages” like it’s Sony not making enough PS5s when the reality is that a lot of the would-be dominants are scared of you. Because they’ve seen how most people talk about them, they’ve seen you react to their expressions of desire with the same discomfort your religious grandparents would show if they saw your browser history, and they’re well aware how many people assume the submissive party is the only one capable of being hurt or abused.
I explained the concept of “blorbo from my shows” to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said “I think I’ll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows” referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby
English isn’t his first language so he’s not super in touch with modern slang, so I’ve been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is “me when I’m a little hater” when he’s like talking shit about the neighbor’s son
Another update: I taught him what it means when something is “the GOAT” and we’ve been teaching the dog new tricks, so whenever he learns a new trick, we call him goated. My grandpa taught him a new skill while I was at work and the first thing he said to me when I got home was “the goated dog knows how to roll over on command now :)”
writing fanfiction is constantly flipping between “this is a hobby i do for fun its not that serious” and “if this isnt my next greatest hit im going to back flip off the empire state building”
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